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Why You Shouldn’t Take Selfies Right Next to a Moving Train
im sorry but
IVE BEEN LAUGHING FOR A YEAR
I feel like Rebel Wilson did whatever the hell she wanted and barely followed the script for this movie.
Rachel Wilson for president
this is literally broni friendzoni taken to the next level
Lmao after my ex cheated on me & I left him he came to my house when I was out and took back all the shit he’d bought for me
there are approximately 1,013,913 words in the english language but i could never string any of them together to explain how much i want to hit you with a chair.
The gays are on sale
cool tops are cheaper.
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I took my girlfriend to an improv show the other night and during intermission we were passionately arguing over whether half a 5 Hour Energy shot would give you 2.5 hours of energy or 5 hours of half-assed energy so we turned around to ask the opinions of the three people behind us and one of them said “Are all your arguments like this because we heard you in the lobby earlier fighting over the right way to pronounce ‘egg’?”
Very occasionally, if you pay really close attention, life doesn’t suck.
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i can watch this for hours
fuck you and your steady hand :’(
sorry for the porn
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Went out and bought a can of pineapple juice cuz Waka said it’d make my cum taste better
too bad your sock doesn’t have taste buds
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